Does your significant other mind your love for Anine (or anything else)?

Hi, again everyone!!
I got into a very interesting discussion with another member about this topic and I wanted to see how you all felt.
This might turn out to be slightly controversial but we'll see how it goes...
I have quite a few friends that thoroughly enjoy Anime but not to the point of making AMV's or watching very, very regularly...
they don't daily watch/read/make videos about Anime. Its more like every few days if maybe like a couple times every week or so.
So the questions (curious of the responses- can be if you're in or out of a relationship or not...just think back to past partners/family members/friends):

1.Does anyone here find they hear from their partners (boy/girlfriends; husbands/wives) that they wished they spent a little less time being engrossed with Anime?

2. Does anyone here personally think they might have to strong a love for Anime that they might actually neglect other portions of their lives?

3. Would you gladly change your behavior for your partner if it really bothered them?

4. Would you openly be with someone who maybe didn't like Anime as much? How would you make the best of the situation if you didn't know to begin with the person didn't like Anime?

5. If Anime isn't your Kryptonite (so to speak) then do you ever get complaints from anyone about something else that you're obsessed with? Do you think they have a problem or do you feel you might have a problem yourself with the obsession?

6. Did you notice you genuinely had a problem before or is it just hitting you that you might right now? *lol for everyone like me who didn't realize until the 11th hour*

lol I just thought this could be a VERY interesting topic. lol sort of like making Spiderman choose his duty to save the world over Mary Jane. My Kryptonite? Reading, writing, and my favorite author (who is absolutely amazing- if you're curious I can certainly divulge! lol)....so what do you all think?

Btw, sorry everyone...
I seem to ask very obscure questions but most that I ask stem from other thought-provoking topics I talk about with friends regularly...
but its always a good thing to consider...

I don't ever think I realize how much I alienate the world when I find a book that i'm particularly in love with. Actually I think I get to the point where I cut other people off and purposefully don't pay attention to them because i'm "preaching" my love for a certain book....you don't really realize until a question like this comes up!

none of my girlfriends ever liked anime and pretty much all of them have givin me a hard time about watching it instead of "pay attention to them" but, they can deal with maybe 2 hours a (late) night of me watching anime. But that doesnt even compare to world of warcraft i cant tell you how much shit i heard to hear about that haha.

Said By Bomb

none of my girlfriends ever liked anime and pretty much all of them have givin me a hard time about watching it instead of "pay attention to them" but, they can deal with maybe 2 hours a (late) night of me watching anime. But that doesnt even compare to world of warcraft i cant tell you how much shit i heard to hear about that haha.

Ohhh i love you Bomb- I so thought I was going to get my A** kicked for asking this...lol
did it used to get you pretty upset to see they didn't like it or you respect that they didn't and they respected that you did....
2 hours is nothing...shoot I could totally deal with that....lol so you're not into the graphic novels and AMV's like other folks so much?
Oh sh*t warcraft? One of my good college buddies was OBSESSED with warcraft...He wouldn't eat for DAYS or mooch off of one of us for food money since he was always paying that damned subscription fee. I still don't know how he managed that for as long as he did but because of injury he was confined to the dorm room! I still marvel at how you can make your characters dance "a jig" and have them act all types of crazy as anything....

lol being honest I do feel it really does "lessen the attention span" since how many people can commit to watching that and hearing their girlfriend drone on about stuff you don't really care about anyway? lol how could you hear any complaints? I think the amount of time and your two hobbies are PERFECT....hey you looking for a girlfriend?...lol!!!! j/k (they are perfect though) My significant other of many, many moons gets aggravated quick because he'll watch hours and hours and hours of anime- read the novels etc., and i'll be like "honey did you just hear a word I said" and he'll mumble something and onward he goes. lol. Did you used to get annoyed when any of them would ask you to stop or "tone it down" a little bit or would you comply?

If you have your significant other caring so much about what you are doing, is it worth it for you to be worried about that?

What I mean is, are you truly happy enough to really stop something you love doing for this person? Really, is it worth losing sleep over?

Ask yourselves that question if you get into situations like this.

I don't know Aron- you bring up awesome questions.....I often wondered the same....
I think when you love someone a lot and you've been with them for a very long time I don't think its necessarily a bad thing to make a change in one's behavior. I worry about it sometimes and I do think i'm not always being fair to my partner when i'm telling him i'm so in love with another man's words that I idolize him (lol, unusual circumstance, innit?). Sometimes he gets really annoyed at me or I can tell he's tuning me out but I keep rambling, senselessly because sometimes I just can't shut up.

I think, in my case, i'm truly happy enough to make a small sacrifice for someone I love. I wouldn't ever want my significant other telling me to entirely stop doing anything I feel strongly about, ever because then they wouldn't care enough about my happiness to let me be in any way that I can. I wouldn't mind if my partner asked me this and just asked me "every once and a while" to take a break and spend some time together. I think you're definitely right. The individual in the situation must weigh how they feel against their partners wishes. Being honest (as i'm growing and learning) i'm realizing relationship is a compromise. Never stop doing what you love for one person- but if they ask you to just spend more time with them, and you genuinely love them, it should never be a problem....never be a reason to let someone go over...I just think it depends on how much you really love them and how important they are to you in your universe.

all mah friends like anime but since i have been doing a report on the World Trade Center i dont have enough time to look at anime but i remember when i waz in 7th grade i used to love anime as if it were mah life I dunno anime and me are on hiatus just like mah last post on loveless (read if for more of the "hiatus" crap)

Said By Takoyaki

all mah friends like anime but since i have been doing a report on the World Trade Center i dont have enough time to look at anime but i remember when i waz in 7th grade i used to love anime as if it were mah life I dunno anime and me are on hiatus just like mah last post on loveless (read if for more of the "hiatus" crap)

Oh the World Trade Center-
NY is my home....you can't get more stunning than that building (especially during the time in which is was built)...
Everytime any of my family sees it on T.V. we all cry...we used to take the train through WTC (the Path train)
Really? What made Anime such a close love of yours? (I ask because I know everybody connects to Anime in different ways)
Do you find you don't have as much time anymore or you're not as attracted to it as you used to be? (i'm talking about it like its a human...lol!!!)

1.Does anyone here find they hear from their partners (boy/girlfriends; husbands/wives) that they wished they spent a little less time being engrossed with Anime?

Um not really. My boyfriend never really watched it but since I started playing it in the same room hes started to like it.

2. Does anyone here personally think they might have to strong a love for Anime that they might actually neglect other portions of their lives?

Not really, I try to DL all of it and then set my media player to just play 3 or 4 episodes and then we go back to gaming.

3. Would you gladly change your behavior for your partner if it really bothered them?

Definitly, he's done so much for me.

4. Would you openly be with someone who maybe didn't like Anime as much? How would you make the best of the situation if you didn't know to begin with the person didn't like Anime?

Yea, if I liked them enough, I would watch my anime while they're at work or out around the house in another room - or save it for a day off.

5. If Anime isn't your Kryptonite (so to speak) then do you ever get complaints from anyone about something else that you're obsessed with? Do you think they have a problem or do you feel you might have a problem yourself with the obsession?

Not really

Oh that’s good that he’s at least open to it! I think especially if its new to the viewer it can be outrageously hard to “get” (if you get my drift- when I first watched Naruto I kept wondering why the hell does that kid have whiskers? What is he cat man? DON’T ANSWER…lol I know now what they are) if you’re a noob to the whole experience.

See Niamh- the way you do it is fair to both you and your partner. You aren’t necessarily forcing it upon him but it sounds like you establish some time to maybe watch a few episodes here and there and game sometimes too. I think it can be good for everyone especially if your
partner isn’t a hardcore Anime addict yet.

Awwwwww and you really would change your behavior for him if it really bothered him? HOW SWEET!!!!! How long have you two been together (if you feel comfortable answering!) that’s really sweet and considerate with you. Its hard to find someone that will truly honor another’s
wishes. You both must be very happy and very lucky to have one another!!! Wow and i’m very amazed at how well you two compromise. Sometimes in relationships with certain people, compromising can be terribly hard. Especially if you’ve got a stubborn personality type thrown in there for excitement purposes. Then you might have a problem. But I must PM you very, very soon and find out all your secrets, lol, its so hard to manage both at the same time but me and my boyfriend are steadily trying to make it work amidst these differences. Btw, you sound like a very kind and patient person IMO!

I play Magic: The Gathering competitively with a lot of my friends. We take a yearly trip to GenCon to participate in Standard and Extended championship events. I think they hold Legacy there too but Legacy is expensive.

Anyway, our girlfriends understand and support us for the most part. I know mine has come to a number of tournaments to watch me play. However, the work and amount of time that goes into winning (or at the very least placing) in any event is something that they get bored of. Whenever we happen to hang out with everyone, i.e.; go on double or quadruple dates with our friends, all the guys want to do with each other is talk about Magic and the girls feel very left out of the conversation. I understand that and sympathize. It's not a question of giving up what you love, it's a question of how much time and effort you put into what you love. If you're not willing to put that much effort into some one you say you love, or at the very least have feelings for, then there is a problem there at your end. They shouldn't be asking you to drop what you do, however, it is normal for them to want attention and recognition as a valued part of your life.

Making AMV's, watching anime, DLing, and other various of hobbies are all swell. But I think when it comes down to actual emotional connection(there person you love) there is none with hobbies. Unless of course you are OBSESSED with the hobby that you have no emotion within you only the emotions within your hobby. Hobbies cant hug you, kiss you, hold you, or even yell at you for that matter cause you said dont add all the stove top...then it becomes soggy and nasty looking (like something that came from your bumhole)...anyways the point im trying to make is that no matter how obsessed you are with a hobby, that hobby can never give you the emotional attachment you need to feel human and alive...

My boyfriends all love anime
We talk about it together a lot
and the people around us thinks we're weird
But who cares....

How many boyfriends do you have? lol. I hate anime, but I am sure if I was dating a girl who loved it, I wouldn't mind.

lol no i meant out of all that i already had
Im not a player... or am I
lol no

r u sure ur not lol i herd the girls talk about their bfs being with u

lol
jk

my Ex hated anime

YAAAAY i'm into anime now i seriously thought me and anime were over but its not I'm soo happy that imma BLAST OFF!!!

This is one of the best threads on the forum. Rather informative.

how can u be over anime this girl in my school said ppl who like anime have no lives and since she loves myspace i tryed to make it sound bad

My last boyfriend liked anime and even introduced me to some anime that I had never heard of before. The guy I like now doesn't really seem interested in it and even laughs at me sometimes (but not in such a way that I'm offended) when I start rambling about anime. I am not so much obsessed by anime as I used to be though, so I don't think it would be that much a competition, you know?

Anime is "moving art" with a story to widen the imagination of an individual. If your loved one brings you down for watching it, their ignorance will only harm them...Its sad that there is actual people that say anime is a waste of life...WTF?! Anxiously waiting for someone to post a comment on your page on Myspace is just wasting perfectly good time, air, eyesight, thought, you name it. My physically and mentally beautiful girlfriend may not LIKE anime as much as I do but, at least she understands and respects the fact that i do and tries to even watch sometimes.

I think its definitely good to consider this next time you feel at odds with your significant other or you aren't and you're counting your blessings for not having to go through this.
I honestly think Anime is a very special thing to many equally special people. & I don't think you should ever give up what you love. I don't think it should ever get that far. I do think that if you love someone and you want them in your life as much as you love that certain special thing (Anime, cooking, picking your nose you name it) then I think that the two should compliment one another as much as possible. I think your interest should become apart of your patners life as much as your partner becomes apart of that interest it could be only slight (you partners interest) but because relationships require so much give and take, one of the strongest ways that your partner can show you how much they love you is by how accepting they are of you and the things you care about. I think its only fair that in return we spend a little extra time with out partner to show how much we are accepting of them, too.

DiamondAngel2: Thats excellent!
Its so nice to have people to surround yourself with that have like interests! I know I probably sound terribly old to you (please don't kill me!!!) but keep that in mind the older you grow....Friends and people who love you very much will make small sacrifices (as should you) if you love someone. Don't EVER let someone take your interests away from you. No one is worth who you are! There i've had my five semi-seconds of being a "MOM" so to speak....i'm sorry....lol I couldn't help it

ExShinobi: I like how you bolded "Ex" lol.....
Some people make a mountain of a molehill. If your ex wasn't willing to at least respect your love for Anime then be very glad she's your ex. Who wants to be with someone that can't at least make an effort to understand your feelings. I don't really think me not liking something enough is really grounds for me to not want to be with someone but I guess to each its own.....but wait until you find that perfect girl that loves Anime as much as you do....Nothing will probably compare!

Takoyaki: Its funny how different loves for things can be rekindled so easily...I think time plays a huge factor in that... Without time it seems like there isn't room for any interests!

Aron: Thank you, friend! I don't know it just popped into my head and I started thinking about how sometimes people can feel at odds with their partner over their interests (think your stereotypical "woman" during football season lol) theres no need to be anything less than supportive even if you don't really appreciate it as much!

hinata0765: Whats for some may not be for others. It doesn't mean people should make fun of your loves. I think many think Anime is just cartoons or some rubbish that just comes on tv sometimes. I don't think they are aware of the beautiful nuances this subculture provides. We can't knock what another person loves but that respect goes both ways and i'm not sure if Myspace is a verifiable interest. Or and art with much history. Its just a networking site....yikes!

Sinistra: Ohh thats wonderful! Especially when both partners can open each other up equally to new and different forms of the art. I bet he doesn't laugh in an offending way (as you mentioned) he probably laughs because he thinks your interest and love for Anime makes everything you say adorable. I think it can be really cute to see someone that you're with (or like) be so passionate about something. This is also proven because he seems to really share a love of it himself. I know exactly what you mean- you like it but if you go a day or a week without it you're not going to be in a bad way. I think its a good way to be- to pace yourself both with the man you like and your interests-- its a good way to keep both refreshing to you without smothering your love for either.

Konojo: Your girlfriend sounds like she loves you very much- I think it can sometimes be a hard thing transplanting one into their partners interests but as long as she can make it worth and you both are happy and comfortable I think this could really work out well for the both of you! Good luck to you, my friend!!

It's definetly about compromise. I don't think that anyone wants to give up something they really love unless they stop loving it naturally. having someone tell you that the something you are fond of is immature or whatever is just ignorant on their part seeing that the thing is a personal choice of yours which makes it you or an extension of you. That person must appreciate that part of you being anime or whatever else. I mean you may love that person enough to 'give it up' but then again are you really?Wouldn't become forbibben fruit that you must have? Wouldn't that cause some sort of underlying resentment towards that person? In the end I think that if there isn't a compromise then thats like putting a timer on the relationship waiting for it to explode or something.

Ichiichi: I completely agree with you. Having someone tell you or <i>force you</i> naturally just takes the love and respect out of any relationship and it makes it unfair the whole way around. I think people are entitled to their opinion but it really should be something they choose to share if it is negative or has the potential to hurt their partners feelings.

I don't think love should make you give up anything that you're strongly passionate about. I mean within bounds. If your partner wanted you to stop doing drugs for instance (obvious instance) even if you're "passionate" about it, you should stop because its a dangerous habit and they don't want to see you hurt yourself. On the other hand, if the interest is completely harmless (meaning can't cause obvious danger to the individual) then I think the person shouldn't be pressured to stop.

I'm sure it would cause a great deal of resentment, you're right, and probably would make the individual more inclined to do it even if it means getting caught. I think if any person ideally would like to get married and start a family they need to compromise all the way. It would be nice to say "I can do whatever I want/say whatever I want and I don't care who it effects" But as we've been mentioning repeatedly its a compromise. The individuals need to just realize whether its worth fighting over that much or if its more worth it to see things the other individual's way. Pick and choose your battles all the way...I think its better to hug then be fighting for 6 weeks, anyway.

Okay thats it I am so not going to read this forum
Its way too long and right now i have no patience (bad spelling)
As you can see i don't really like to read the computer screen a lot
I have no idea way i like this web site so much if it takes so much reading...
=)
PS how on earth do you have so much to say! wow!
You must be fun in parties...

lollllll DiamondAngel2
i'm absolutely CRAZY when it comes to writing...my only adversary? Writing a 15 page paper in college once......
I got to page 13 just fine...it was finding crap as filler for the remaining 2 pages that kicked my behind. You should really hear me speak in person my friend...
I CAN TALK! No joke....But I have heard i'm fun at parties...People don't much like the intellectual side as much as the drunken and slightly incoherent side...everyone loves THAT part of the me....